6th Chapter

Part 11 The government’s solution


With this new uninvited but hopefully needed guest from the government inside command HQ tent, the General asks Professor Greevy: Just what help will you be able to provide?

Professor Greevy replies: We have been monitoring this Peril in Onion County, and although the federal level feels that the main army from the surrounding area should be mobilized, the state of New Jersey reassured the feds that this is just a nuisance. Trenton has sent me as the one person to easily dismiss this.

The General sputters: Professor, there is a 110 foot tall LHS with moldy feet stomping its way through Onion County, threatening all residents. We have no idea how many casualties are out there. There is an untold amount of destruction. Spewing blather is creating an army of dimwitted zombies. A major resolution is needed from Trenton, and they sent you?

The sunrise revealed the frustration in the General’s furrowed brow. Professor Dotcom then speaks: Now see here, we have been fighting this LHS from the beginning, and I may have an idea for resolving……………..

But before he could finish, Professor Greevy interrupts arrogantly: Look, we know all about this and see it as a minor inconvenience for this county. The state legislature convened last night and agreed to send me as their representative. I am fully capable to handle this situation. I have history and English degrees from both Kean College and Rutgers University, and I got passing grades on the chemistry electives I took at those colleges. Because of this wealth of education, the state certified me in molecular biogenetics. So step aside and I will discuss the final resolution with the General. I am handling this now.

The General nods to Professor Dotcom to stand back. There will be no test of academic wills while this LHS with its horde of blithering zombies remains at large.

Ok, General, says Professor Greevy: Here is your solution. Since we at Trenton have been monitoring this from the beginning, we heard that the LHS veers away from libraries. As we all know libraries contain paper, so with my superior intellect I was able to determine that bleached paper is the answer. The state legislature has voted on an emergency $50 million appropriation for supplies. A large plane rented from Corey Zine Plane rentals now waits at Teterboro with the full supply of paper determined. These supplies were bought from Norcrass Paper Supply Company, so they are grade A. But, since Libraries contain more than just paper, to be safe, the legislature also directed us to stock this plane with inks bought from Codie Ink Company, index cards from Roeberts Card Company, chairs from Stander Furniture Company and light bulbs from Greenie Electrical Supply. Cost of course for expediency was no object in acquiring these items. Once dropped from above onto this LHS of yours, it will be instantly destroyed. The plane is ready to take off from Teterboro, when word is given.

Professor Dotcom interjects to Professor Mac Greevy: Professor there has to be more to the solution than just these products. Paper won’t solve this; even light bulbs and chairs. There are light bulbs throughout the county and the LHS just stomped right over them. I was sitting in front of a pad of paper and a pen with ink all night and wasn’t cured of the blather induced contagion.

Greevy indignantly responds: Look, Professor Dotcom, do you have a state certification in molecular biogenetics? No? Then allow me to continue. The legislature in their emergency appropriation deemed that these items needed to be purchased from these exact companies in order to protect the safety of the seniors, hard working families and children of NJ. You do care about children, don’t you Professor?

Professor Dotcom, nodded yes, and confused with the logic of the fully certifiable professor stumbled back and allowed him the latitude.

It is now pushing 7am, the green hued sunlight glints off the wasteland of Onion County. The General radios above to Major Bury: Major where’s the LHS now?

Still in Rahway, Sir, but moving toward Linden. The armories from Middlesex County appear to have deflected the LHS back northward, fortunately.

General Renna turns toward Professor Greevy and gives the word: Go, professor!

Professor Greevy pulls out the miniature radio phone from his pocket, flips the transmitter switch and with a muffled whisper into the front says: All systems go, its show time.

He turns back toward the General and says: In thirty minutes, all your problems will be solved and you’ll look like a hero, thanks to Trenton.

The General mumbles under his breath: Yes, let’s pin all our hopes on Trenton and the state legislature.

Professor Greevy quizzically asks: Did you say something General?

The General replies: No, it must have been the morning’s breaking winds.

Professor Greevy turned toward the north and looked to the sky for his plane.



Part 12 Oh Happy Day, What?


Professor Greevy, cloaked in tight kaki garb and an awkward fitting gas mask, gazed up through the polarized rose colored lenses of the mask and intensely studies the early morning skies northward over Onion County. Some enlisted men stop their duties and look in that direction also. This morning has its period of seeming quiet as if the normal county calm prevailed; a calm all but punctuated by insistent rocket fire coming from the direction of the Linden area. All of this is now heard through a strangely induced haze, perhaps from dust raised from the stomping fungus feet along with the airborne blather of the LHS, perhaps the many collapsed and burning buildings, perhaps the smoke wisps of the rocket trails as they try with futility to bring the beast down, maybe the combination of all three to nurture it’s creation. All of this slowly wafting from that direction, where the LHS was fought back in the middle of the night from the valiant forces of the Middlesex county armories. The demarcation held.

Dispensing his duties despite the non-stop 24 hours, Major Bury, from the observation post atop Franklin school, is first to notify command HQ.

Plane coming. Looks like a Dehavilland 760 cargo. Wing lettering says ‘Corey Zine Plane Rentals’. ETA 5 minutes.

The sudden and heightened tension of the compound could be felt. The drone of the props are at first low but then could be heard loud. The cargo plane now could be seen following a southerly route with the parkway below as the guide. Its target- the LHS, which is now making its way on Stiles street crossing St George in Linden. Behind the LHS the destruction of the Pathmark and Gulf station left in flames. The progress all being reported by Major Bury and his telephoto binoculars.

Professor Dotcom, in the background studying the local maps announces the prognosis: The forecast of intersecting paths of plane and beast plants the point squarely in the fields behind Mother Seton High School.

Professor Greevy seconds: This will be the final waterloo of your LHS. Machiavelli couldn’t have written a better end to this nuisance.

It is now 9 AM. Professor Greevy switches his radiophone to aeronautical mode and radios the occupants of the plane above: Captains Marvey and Hilgram, do you see the target?

Chump change, Professor Greevy, responded Capt Marvey. Looks like we’ll meet that nuisance near a circular road that underpasses this Parkway route.

In the meanwhile, many of the men at HQ have joined Major Bury at the school roof to observe the victory they all expect. General Renna, frowns on this since no orders to that effect were given, but the situation permitted some leeway and it would be a good victory to observe. The ball is now in Trenton, Greevy and Marvey’s court to end this Peril.

From Professor Greevy’s radio phone comes the plane’s ongoing progress overheard from the serious monotone voices: Approaching target……opening bomb bay doors………..Capt Hilgram, do you have the sighting in the target lens…yes, captain…adjust path 2 degrees SSW, decline 5 degrees, wind minimal…….steady……steady……steady……steady….fire in the hole. Payload away!

Major Bury then reports down, with the men on the roof heard cheering in the background:. General, the plane dropped its payload, now veering off toward the coast. The furniture. bulbs and ink dropping on the LHS. The paper appears to now be covering the beast, a desk had a direct hit on the LHS head…..Oh my god, the LHS just let out a projectile stream of blather and it just hit the plane. The plane is faltering and losing speed. It’s swerving north and appears an impact area will be around Elizabeth.

From professor Greevy’s radio, a frantic Capt. Marvey could be heard. We’re going down, no time to bail out, we are heading for some county building in Elizabeth, can’t pull up, pedals jammed, going down. Can’t stop…………….

The radio frequency went dead.

Major Bury reporting in sudden grave tones: It looks like the plane hit direct into the top 6th floor of a Onion County administration bldg. It’s now in flames. Just horrible! Hold it; my men are signaling me to turn toward the LHS. Sorry, General, I digressed from the operation at hand. General, the LHS is covered in ink, paper, broken bulbs and chairs. A huge vapor trail is rising off the surface of the LHS. The LHS surface must be hot; the ink is evaporating making huge dark clouds above it. The LHS appears to be shaken and stumbling. It just fell, tripped over the parkway bridge and fell into the Target mall nearby. The LHS is down, the LHS is down. The LHS is lying there smoldering in its mist, its not moving.

Professor Greevy lets out a huge whoop through his gas mask: Oh, happy day!

The men on the ground and on the school roof are cheering. General Renna looks at Professor Dotcom and with a shrug gives a thumbs up.

But then Major Bury’s voice breaks the silence: General, the LHS is not staying down. It’s rising again. It must have been that direct hit from a desk that knocked the LHS over. It may be the operation was unsuccessful. This does not look good. The creature is up again, moving north on Central avenue. This is bad, really bad. My god, what is happening…………..?

Major Bury could not finish that thought. The command HQ heard it across the green misted sky, too. The LHS released a huge roar heard county wide. One ominous sound, loud and clear:

DUH!

Major Bury again reporting down to HQ below: Oh, oh, looks like we got trouble. That noise, whatever it was alerted all the zombies from around the area. It looks like hordes of those blithering idiot zombies are now making their way through the Onion County College debris field. General, they may be heading this way.

Captain Monarch from the corner of the tent blurts out: General, that’s LesManiac’s and Cryandsob’s hordes. There’s got to be hundreds of them.

General Renna cries to Professor Dotcom and to his radio man to get on the speaker: Batten down, we’re in code red!

Professor Greevy says: What? This just couldn't be. Trenton and I were wrong?